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File List
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1994-02-08
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17KB
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446 lines
JOKES & QUOTES DATA FILES
When you register Jokes & Quotes you'll receive the latest version
of the program along with ALL the data files currently compiled.
This is the complete listing of the data files currently available
for Jokes & Quotes. You can read the section after this list of file
names to get a short description of each category.
The * beside a filename indicates the file is included with the
evaluation (shareware) copy of Jokes & Quotes. (Note: Jokes & Quotes
can access twenty five categories at one time.)
Topic name: Filename: # of records
1. THINGS TO THINK ABOUT * THKABOUT - 119 records
2. OXYMORONS OXYMORON - 114 records
3. ONE LINE WIT * ONELINE - 310 records
4. TYPOS TYPOS - 110 records
5. SELECTED SCRIPTURES * SELECT - 365 records
6. THE BOOK OF PROVERBS PROVERBS - 601 records
7. KID TALK * KIDTALK - 93 records
8. POLITICS * POLITICS - 65 records
9. YOU KNOW YOU'RE GETTING OLD WHEN... GETNOLD - 46 records
10. QUIPS & WIT * QUIPWIT - 344 records
11. QUOTED * QUOTED - 180 records
12. QUOTABLE * QUOTABLE - 112 records
13. DISORDER IN THE COURT! TRANSQUIPS! * DISORDER - 34 records
14. THE CANONICAL COLLECTION OF LIGHT BULB JOKES * BULBJOKE - 55 records
15. REAL LIFE IN FANTASY LAND! TV AXIOMS * TVAXIOMS - 83 records
16. PRACTICAL JOKES * PRACJOKE - 66 records
17. DOWN HOME FUN * DOWNHOME - 83 records
18. FORTUNE COOKIES * COOKIES - 691 records
19. ZIPPY THE PINHEAD * ZIPPY - 104 records
20. REAL DUMB PEOPLE JOKES * REALDUMB - 132 records
21. THE SEXES THESEXES - 71 records
22. ASCII ART * ASCIIART - 82 records
23. YOUNG'S 1861 SCIENTIFIC SECRETS SECRETS - 99 records
24. DR. FRANKLINS MAXIMS FOR WEALTH * MAXIMS - 90 records
25. SOMETING NICE NICE - 65
26. YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK WHEN... * REDNECKS - 54
27. I'D REALLY LOVE TO BUT... * EXCUSES - 100
28. SQUEAKY CLEAN SQUEAKY - 102
29. LIMERICKS LIMERICK - 78
30. DAFFINITIONS DAFFY - 129
31. COMPUTER QUIPS & QUIBBLES COMPQUIP - 150
32. TRUTHS TRUTHS - 55
33. JOKES TO TELL THE KIDS * TELLKIDS - 280
34. NATURAL LAWS NATURAL - 192
35. IF IF - 65
******************* From here down may cause controversy ********************
36. LAWYERS LAWYERS - 101 records
37. LAWYERS II * LAWSHORT - 45 records
38. TOP-10 * TOP10 - 104 records
39. INSULT ME! * INSULTS - 51
40. PHILOSOPHICAL QUOTES PHILQUOT - 326
41. WHAT ABOUT SEX? SEX - 72
The first portion of this list should be suitable for just about
any network environment. The second list of files have the potential
to cause controversy in a public environment. You might want to read
over these files before installing them on a network. (Note: All of
the data used by the Jokes & Quotes program has been censored to remove
sexually explicit or vulgar langauge.)
1. THINGS TO THINK ABOUT
Filename: THKABOUT - 119 records
This is a specially selected collection of jokes, quotes, and short
stories that bear special consideration. They offer insight and fodder
for contemplation. For anyone who seeks more of wisdom this collection
will provide much to be pondered.
2. OXYMORONS
Filename: OXYMORON - 114 records
Ancient Greek : Oxus = "sharp" - Moros = "dull"
Oxymoron...a self contradicting phrase.
For example: A sharp dullness or a foolish wise.
3. ONE LINE WIT
Filename: ONELINE - 310 records
This is a tremendous collection of "One Liners". Quotes, jokes,
quips, maxims, wisdom and more all in a single line.
4. TYPOS
Filename: TYPOS - 110 records
This is a collection of typographical errors made by professionals
in their field. Most look like honest mistakes but some kind'a make
you wonder.
5. SELECTED SCRIPTURES
Filename: SELECTED - 365 records
This is a collection of selected scripture verses taken from the
King James version of the Holy Bible. Over 300 scriptures, each
selected for the special message it bears.
6. THE BOOK OF PROVERBS
Filename: PROVERBS - 601 records
The is the entire book of Proverbs from the King James version of
the Holy Bible. The Book of Proverbs encompasses a vast array of
human situations from love and marriage to drunks and thievery.
There are some real gems of wisdom here.
7. KID TALK
Filename: KIDTALK - 93 records
This is a collection of jokes that deals with the child's point of
view. Easy going fun that any parent can relate to.
8. POLITICS
Filename: POLITICS - 65 records
Whether you're a Republican, a Democrat or an innocent bystander
you're bound to feel the effects of a "Government at large".
This collection of jokes, quotes and political ponderings tries to
"lighten up" the darker side of our country's leadership.
9. YOU KNOW YOU'RE GETTING OLD WHEN...
Filename: GETNOLD - 46 records
It's a fact of life. If you live long enough you're going to get
old. Considering the alternatives, are there any reason why you
wouldn't want too?
Just in case you're getting old and you havn't quite realized it
yet...Try a few of these to see if they ring any bells...
10. QUIPS & WIT
Filename: QUIPWIT - 344 records
This is a large collection of quips, one liners, and witticisims.
Not a whole lot of wisdom but the fun abounds...
11. QUOTED
FIlename: QUOTED - 180 records
A collection of quotes from many famous and not-so-famous people.
Always witty but not necessarily wise.
12. QUOTABLE
Filename: QUOTABLE - 112 records
This is a collection of quotes from many famous people with
something to say. Most of the quotes here are laden with wisdom and
understanding.
13. DISORDER IN THE COURT! TRANSQUIPS!
Filename: DISORDER - 34 records
Most language is spoken language, and most words once they are
uttered vanish forever into the air. But such is not the case with
language spoken during courtroom trials, for there exists an army of
court reporters whose job it is to take down and preserve every
statement made during the proceedings.
Court is now in session, and here are some favorite transquips, all
recorded by America's keepers of the courtroom word:
This file was posted on the Fidonet Mensa Echo by Bob Hirshfeld,
Esq., of Greater Phoenix Mensa.
14. THE CANONICAL COLLECTION OF LIGHT BULB JOKES
Filename: BULBJOKE - 55 records
Light Bulb jokes, you know what these are all about...
15. REAL LIFE IN FANTASY LAND! TV AXIOMS
Filename: TVAXIOMS - 83 records
Have you ever been watching a TV show and you just know what's going
to happen next. You say, "Watch this, he's going to...", or something
like, "You know that could never happen in real life...". Well if you
have you've been victimized by TV axiom's.
In the real world 6000 bullets fired